My aforementioned concern regarding the flight abroad not only hit the
mark, but blew threw it, knocked out 2 walls behind it and then went out to outer-fucking-space
to take out a few Aliens for spite. I could have never, in a million years,
anticipated what I would have to endure to exit the US. I most certainly went
out like a lion; and will be in no hurry to return anytime soon.
As soon as exiting the plane at LAX I made a beeline for the customer
service area to check-in for my flight to Sydney, where I was once again informed
that I had no reservation. SERIOUSLY?! After an extremely lengthy phone call
between United and the kiosk representative, during which I paced nervously, wearing a hole in the already threadbare carpet, yet receiving no updates, the agent finally gave me back my passport and told me
they THINK they fixed the issue. Feeling hopeful, though not optimistic, I
headed to the gate to check-in as the agent had instructed. Once there, the gate
attendant tried multiple times to check me in without success, but finally
another agent angrily told them what they were doing wrong and quickly printed
my boarding pass. Thank the Lord above, right? WRONG. We are now about 5
minutes prior to boarding this packed 15-hour flight. As an after thought the
attendant decided to check my flights to New Zealand to make sure I wouldn’t
have any issues in Australia. I was extremely appreciative of this right up
until the agent discovered that by some oversight my stay in Australia was
greater than 27 hours. A traveler, of any citizenship, can only stay in Australia, in a
strictly country-hopping capacity, for up to 8 hours; otherwise they require a
Visa. Since United failed to inform me of this necessity, I did not have one. The
aforementioned angry-pants agent then did something that provoked me to burst
into hysterical tears; they ripped up my boarding pass and told me I couldn’t
go to Sydney. They were now boarding my section.
The gate agent told me that I could apply for a Visa online, but how?
Where? Would there be enough time? I couldn’t call anyone because once again,
my phone can’t make calls. Everything came crashing down on me, the harsh
realization: I was in LAX with no way to get anywhere, and I my life abroad was
now in ruins for the second time. I couldn’t help but experience defeat; it
simply wasn’t meant to be…. I felt crushed. My new life was over before it had
even begun and still worse, I had no 'old life' to go back to.
Then something unexpected and absolutely amazing happened, about 5
people immediately set to the task of somehow getting me this Visa within the
next 15 minutes, prior to boarding closure. One women, I’ll call her my Angel,
sat me down and explained that she had done the application online for her
husband and herself a couple of days ago and they got their Visas instantly.
For some divine reason, though the complimentary Wi-Fi was not working for anyone
else in the area, Safari fired up on my phone. She found the website and got the
application open for me, I literally shook while filling it out and made a lot of mistakes
as I fretted over completing it on-time; it was going to be a photo finish. Motivated by her resolve, my optimism grew and I decided then and there that this
shit-tastic debacle would somehow workout; I was being tested and I was
determined to prove how badly I wanted this change in my life. I seemed to be
moving along smoothly so my Angel boarded the plane with her husband and assured
me that she’d see me onboard. On the second to last page of the application I
was having difficulty getting the website to accept the phone number I had
entered, and the sketchy internet connection was starting to waiver. They were
now boarding the last group and only a handful of people remained in the gate
area. Literally sweating cortisol, I began to tear up again affirming ‘I’m not
going to make it’, and that’s when a younger guy came over to help me. The
application finally accepted the phone number and now I was entering my payment
information, he read me the credit card numbers because I was shaking too violently to hold both the phone and the credit card. Miraculously, within seconds it
processed and sent me my email confirmation. He went down the jetway as I
re-checked in with LITERALLY seconds to spare; they shut the gate, and also the
airplane doors, behind me. When I entered the plane more than a few people
actually cheered, sharing in my relief at having made the flight! If these were
Australians, I loved them!
Phew, but seriously, WTF?! I took my seat in full adrenaline burn out and
coaxed myself to breath. It was over; I was on the plane and bound for
Australia…. I’ll figure out the New Zealand thing tomorrow. If the worst thing
that happens to me in Sydney is having to stay there for a night, I will
consider myself the most blessed person on God’s green Earth.
 |
| FINALLY!!! |
PS. To United Airlines I say this: VERY BADLY DONE! I was such a loyal
United customer, but losing both of my itineraries in one day and selling me a
literally impossible connection through a foreign country is too much to bare.
There’s nothing I can really do, but I’ll certainly think twice before booking
with United ever again (...8over years later, I've kept this promise to myself).
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