Faction Identity

This article will be the first in a series entitled "Divergent Inspired Musings," all of which can be found under that label. Consequently, at least a superficial understanding of  this magnificent dystopian world created by Veronica Roth, via book (best) and/or motion film (good), is necessary to fully appreciate these introspections. Enjoy!

Though I'm not proud to admit this, I watched the movie prior to reading the book; as the film's plot progressed, I watched and wondered which faction I might identify with best. During their first meal at the Dauntless compound, Tris and her other faction transfers were talking and Christina, Candor-born, kept speaking in a brutally frank manner. Will, Erudite-born, iterated "You have to be pretty self-confident to hang out with a Candor," to which Christina replied "What's that supposed to mean?" Will: "You have no filter, you say the first thing that comes into your head." My friend and I instantly looked at each other and laughed as we confidently placed me within that faction. I also agreed with Christina's final retort, "at least we tell the truth." Indeed, to me the truth is of paramount importance; a quality I learned to hold sacred throughout a childhood of lies and disappointments. I vowed early to never lie, not to spare the feelings of others and not even to save my own life; but I have also come to understand that my truth is not always someone else's truth, and that I'd be better off learning when to keep that truth to myself, and to keep my mouth shut; a topic I visited previously in other musings (Refer to point #1, in particular). As an aside I'll mention that I was so impressed by the movie that I immediately set out to read the book series because, in my experience, the books are always better and these works were no exception to that general rule.

Perhaps the most intriguing aspect of this world is that at the age of 16 they take an aptitude test which tells them which faction they belong to innately, but then there is a choosing ceremony where, regardless of that result, they choose which faction to join. In analyzing how I might live among this dystopian society, knowing that my natural tendencies would undoubtedly place me among the Candor, I wondered whether or not it would be the faction I would choose for myself. My investigation took the following interesting points into consideration:

• Would one truly thrive living within a community composed of personality clones? 
• What happens when one chooses against their innate personality? Is change possible, or would one always feel like an outsider, a fake, or even a liar?
• Is it acceptable to excuse someone's shitty behavior based on typical faction conduct?

These are questions that everyone should evaluate for themselves, but I was a bit thrown by my own responses. I do, however, enjoy surprising myself because it signifies continued personal growth; without which life would be an impotent journey.

A Faction of Wild Cards?

The series describes the Candor as a group of highly argumentative people who venerate the truth and do not believe in secrets. Additionally, they feel entitled to judge others based on what they view as objective truth conjured by the use of a truth serum, under the influence of which people cannot lie. What I lack is the judgement aspect of that psyche, as well as an ardor for feuding. Frankly, I have no right to judge anyone, a topic I've previously touched upon; and while I honor the truth, I can't be bothered to argue about it. In fact, I actually refuse to argue; if I know someone is wrong, unless I believe remaining ignorant will hurt them in some form or fashion, I leave them to continue in their own line of reasoning. I understand and respect that everyone is different and believes alternative truths based on their unique set of experiences. Most importantly, I have no right to judge them on those experiences, so I allow them to keep believing what makes them comfortable and happy. For example, I know evolution to be true while others steadfastly insist Humans were created instantaneously by an amorphous Being. Their disbelief of evolution doesn't affect me in any tangible way other than superficial feelings of irritation, so I won't argue about it; their truth does not change my truth, so why argue?

Admittedly, I'm generally a Grade A Asshole. My personality is riddled with defects a typical Candor would likewise possess; I'm stubborn, hopelessly selfish, devoid of sympathy, largely uncompromising, and frank to the point of inappropriate. In fact, I lack one of the most critical qualities which might enable me to live among a group of such people: Patience. I'm not equal to handling a community of members who share my pronounced character flaws; it would simply be exhausting. Consequently, I'd likely choose to leave.

Faction Before Blood

As a rule, and in a vain attempt to mitigate the defects detailed above, I seek self-improvement. Consequently, I believe it would be difficult to improve my personality if I chose to surround myself with people who harbor the traits I wish to alter. In doing so I would essentially outgrow my faction, become less like them and more alien should I prove successful in my endeavors. Instead, I would chose a faction that cultivates the characteristics I wish to instill in myself such as patience, humility, selflessness and unfailing kindness. These traits belong to the Abnegation faction; Tris's faction of origin. Despite my sincere desire to ingrain these attributes into my personality, however, I fear that living among those who embody them naturally would make me feel inadequate rather than empowered; getting closer to obtaining those habits, yet never quite owning them. Could I 'fake it til I make it'? Can I truly recondition my personality? Or would I ultimately feel like a liar, unable to properly embed myself into the society.

While I want to believe I can and will change, I'm not convinced that I could switch factions without lingering feelings of regret regarding my decision, as well as estrangement between me and my new community members. Obviously, I really don't have a concrete answer for this series of esoteric questions, but meditating on them gives me hope and keeps me positive; small changes are possible, but permanently amending innate mannerisms, what we bring as Beings into this life, are not likely to leave us without significant motivation. 

That's Just Candor

The answer to this one is simple for me. While others may choose to be victims of their intrinsic personality traits and/or expect to be pardoned using their faction's celebrated characteristics, relying on the assumption that they just don't know any better, I choose to take responsibility for mine independent of any societal-imposed identity. Critically, this does not mean that I always act and speak with a high degree of decorum. Conversely, anyone who has interacted with me for more than 5 minutes will tell you otherwise; and yes, I often make questionable decisions.  I strive to avoid excusing my behavior, however; I'd rather accept the consequences on my own terms and live them out knowing it's what I deserve. This is the only way I can hope to learn from poor behavior and mistakes in general.

[WARNING: ADULT LANGUAGE AHEAD]

Here's a fun example: I love saying Fuck; it's without a doubt my favorite word. It's versatile and, for me, bestows humor unto otherwise mundane conversations. This partiality is mainly due to my beloved Grandfather's impressive, albeit excessive, use of the word which imparted a fondness that I find increasingly difficult to uproot. I learned the word young and its use has been a quintessential aspect of my language since I was 5 years old; and though my overuse of the word has certainly done me more harm than good, its place in my vernacular has remained steadfast. Recently, due to a plethora of reasons, I've become almost committed to cutting it from my vocabulary. Now on Earth, if there were factions, my faction of origin would be best described as "White Trash." Yes, identifying myself as White Trash would excuse my chronic use of this otherwise distasteful and inadmissible word, but since I chose to leave that identity behind many moons ago (and I didn't need an aptitude test to tell me to leave), allowing this aspect of that identity to persist is hardly acceptable. Besides, I don't say Fuck because my family uses it, I say it because I CHOOSE to keep using it. I'll own it's proving to be an extremely difficult habit to break, but I will persist until I eventually succeed or I end up saying "Fuck it." Yet, I will never excuse the behavior based on anything other than my own decision to keep saying it regardless of its negative connotations.

What's interesting is that in reading this through I'm now coming to realize why I don't feel like I fit in anywhere, and never really have; I seek continual changes within my personality in the endless pursuit of self improvement. I've never felt like I belonged where I came from, nor do I feel like I fit in where I am now; perhaps this is what provoked my decision to become a Kiwi. In the end the result is that I'm cautious of societies that share my own characteristics, but neither do I feel part of any other community; their innate behaviors something I can not replicate.  Truly, I'm factionless.